“Your connections are far, far more important than your talent as a writer, your expertise regarding your subject, or even your persistence and dedication.”

-Jon Morrow

In the affairs of men, nothing matters more in building wealth, influence and leverage than the friends you keep. In short, your network!

So, are you honing your network day and night?

Brian Tracy once quipped, “You can’t fly with the eagles if you keep scratching with the turkeys.”

Chinua Achebe said in Things Fall Apart, “If a child washed his hands he could eat with kings.”

An English cliché says, “birds of the same feather flock together”, and another says, “show me who your friends are, and I’ll tell you who you are.”

Though the last saying is about character issues, it applies equally to the subject of our discussion – mentorship, networking.

Dennis P. Kimbro, once asked Don King, “what are your goals?” King fired back, “to become America’s first black billionaire.”

Kimbro then queried, “how are you going to do that?” King retorted, “I just told you, by hanging around billionaires, learning all they know.”

Harv Eker, the author of Think Rich to Get Rich: Secrets of the Millionaire Mind, has a test. He administers the test to attendees of his Million Mind Intensive seminar.

Here is the test. Write down the names of the top seven friends you spend most of your time with (excluding spouses and kids).  Eker says the average income of every attendee always reflect the average income of their top seven friends.

I conducted a similar exercise in my Dig Your Well Before You Are Thirsty mega-seminar years back. What they discovered dumbfounded the attendees. All vowed to rethink the friends and networks they keep.

Whenever you attend a social function, watch closely who hangs around with who.

Here is what you’ll  find. After the greetings and pleasantries, the people will imperceptibly drift into the groups they belong.

The poor will gather together to moan the bad economy.

The middle class will be back slapping each other boasting about the next big toy they are planning to acquire.

The rich will be talking in hush tones where the next big investment is likely to come from.

Generally, you won’t see the super-rich in these social events . They typically meet on secretive islands to plot the next mega deals.

Networking right is so critical to success in life and in business that you ignore or neglect this discipline at your own peril.

If you observe, the poorest people have the shallowest networks or no network at all to talk about. When the poor is in a bind, he has no friend to turn to.

The opposite is true of the rich and super-rich. They all have well-oiled networks. This enable them to have advance information about new government policies before they become public knowledge.

They are always the first to hear about new high-yielding private placements.

And they use their networks to literally save their lives.

When a close mentor suffered a life-threatening brain clot that made him pass out suddenly, his network came to his rescue.

One phone call and he was flown to London.  A simple but delicate procedure that drained fluid from his skull was carried out and he came back to life.

In her 2008 presentation at the then ASTD (American Society for Training and Development) International Conference, entitled Mastering Professional Networking: Turning Relationships into Lifelong Assets, Neusa Hirota, an American of Japanese descent, who was brought up in Brazil, and speaking little English, told the awesome story how she used the power of networks to change jobs four times within six years, and secure jobs in some of the most powerful establishments on earth, including the World Bank.

It was from her presentation that I first learnt about the theory of “Six Degrees of Separation.”

Six degrees of separation is the theory that anyone on the planet can be connected to any other person on the planet through a chain of acquaintances that has no more than five intermediaries.

The theory was first proposed in 1929 by the Hungarian writer, Frigyes Karinthy, in a short story called “Chains.”

We will not join the debate about the accuracy of the theory. Just know that you can become insanely successful if you use the power of networks to your advantage.

Like every other discipline, networking has its own rules. Follow the rules.

Don’t go about networking by thumping your complimentary card into the hand of every person you meet.  I can assure you your card will end up in a dustbin. Today it’s E-Card. Stop sending E-Cards to people that don’t know you.

If you want to join a network, have something to offer, be selfless, and join gracefully, preferably from the bottom.

If you do a good home work, you will be able to join the strongest battalions.

The easiest and best places to start are through webinars, workshops, and conferences.

Join clubs and associations like Lions, Toastmasters, Rotary, Optimists, ATD, and SHRM, CIPM, CIBN, ICAN, NIM, etc., to mention but a few.

Don’t forget your old school alumni association and PTA (Parents and Teachers Association).

And don’t forget social media – particularly LinkedIn, X and YouTube.

Seek out people with similar passion or interest as you. Share your thoughts, ideas, and the portfolio of what you’re currently working on.

Indeed, take advantage of every networking opportunity that suits your passion and temperament.

Remember, the devil you know is better than the angel you do not know.

Building a network is a marathon. It’s not a hundred meters dash. You may have to toil for months and even years.

Like any other discipline in life, learn to understand the concept of networking.

What I mean is, education is important.

Be a guru in your little field.

Who would want to do business with you if you have nothing to offer?

Read the best books on networking. Keith Ferazzi, the author of two best-selling books on networking, Who’s Got Your Back, and Never Eat Alone, has taken the discipline of networking to a whole new level. You can start with the books.

From your network, you may find people who may turn out to be your mentors.

Without sounding trite, never underrate what the right mentor can do for you.

Isaac Newton’s most popular saying is, “if I have seen further, it is by standing on the shoulders of giants.”

To Napoleon Bonaparte, “God is always on the side of the strongest battalions.”

Your mentor, you and your network can form the strongest battalion and you can see far into the horizon when you take networking seriously.

Remember this:

• Warren Buffett was mentored by the economist Benjamin Graham
• Dr. Ernest Azudialu-Obiejesi was mentored by his father
• Tony Elumelu was mentored by Chief Ebitimi Banigo
• Richard Branson was mentored by Sir Freddie Laker
• Rich Schefren had Jay Abraham as his mentor
• Bob Dylan was mentored by Woody Guthrie
• Bill Gates was mentored by Paul Allen
• Richard Branson had Freddie Laker
• Brian Fell mentored Ben Ofungwu
• Jeff Bezos had David Shaw

So, who is your mentor?